


The Long Walk Home

by mansikka



Series: Filling In The Gaps [33]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Making Up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-15
Updated: 2017-08-15
Packaged: 2018-12-15 16:42:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,167
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11810022
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mansikka/pseuds/mansikka
Summary: Alec and Magnus make their way to the loft.





	The Long Walk Home

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Desirae](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Desirae/gifts).



> Hello :) as requested by Desirae, here's a coda of sorts following on from That Scene in 2x20 where I think all our hearts were broken and mended at the same time. 
> 
> I love this show, so, so much...
> 
> :)
> 
> x

Really, considering the distance between Hunters Moon and Magnus’ loft, their walk should not be taking anywhere near the time it is taking. He’d thought, Alec laughs to himself as he makes another attempt to regain his breath, that the urgency that he felt, that he feels pulsing through Magnus as well, would mean that there would be nothing to keep them from being truly alone.  

Or maybe, he amends, it’s that very urgency that’s keeping them from taking no more than a stumbling step closer to putting a closed door behind them, and instead has them reaching for one another, pulling each other close, breathing each other in like the very air has been missing something vital while they’ve been apart.

Alec isn’t complaining, though, not really, not with the way they keep crowding together, kissing until they’re breathless, and letting their hands linger over anywhere they can get to, seeking reassurance that they are both still there.

It had been Magnus who’d broken first, making a disgruntled little noise that Alec was sure meant _not quick enough_ , and before they’d made it even to the end of that alley behind Hunters Moon had reached for Alec, dragged him in for a kiss that tasted of hearts mending, trust rebuilding, and a whole lot of promise of whatever was to come.

Not, Alec reminds himself as he wraps his arms low around Magnus’ waist and pulls him in again, that they don’t have a world of things to talk about. If they don’t learn their lessons this time, then they have no business breaking each other ever again. Alec makes himself another promise that no matter how hard it gets, no matter what’s at stake, they’ll talk next time. Because in their lives, there will always be a next time; the lesson they have to learn from this, is how to handle it. Together.

“Alexander,” Magnus breathes, and it knots Alec’s stomach, has him cradling Magnus close to him as a group of Mundanes approach to pass them and grumble about them _getting a room_. Like they’re not already on their way to do just that, Alec mumbles after them, but is distracted for only a second; how could his attention be anywhere else but on the feel of Magnus’ lips on his neck, his breath over his ear, his body warm against him fitting as perfect as he always has done.

“I need you,” Alec tells him, and it’s a quiet, desperate confession, one that rips its way out of his throat and cracks just enough to have Magnus’ eyes lift, observe him in sadness, then close in what Alec assumes must be guilt.

“You have me,” Magnus replies, his own voice softer, more raw than usual, and it’s one thing to hear that sorrow in his voice, but to see the corners of his eyes prick with tears, well, it’s just too much.  

Alec raises his hand, cups his cheek, presses the gentlest kiss he can offer over Magnus’ eyelid, then repeats it with the other, not caring that the dark shade there will temporarily stain his lips. Why would he, when Magnus tilts his chin to be kissed all over again, and he can chase away that taste of sorrow and replace it with a sweeter one of hope.

“I can’t be without you,” Alec says then, and this time his voice really cracks, a sob following immediately, and calling Magnus to wrap his arms even tighter around him still, murmuring reassurances into his skin.

“You won’t have to,” he promises, and Alec can’t get him close enough, can’t hold him tight enough to be convinced he’ll never have him out of his grip again.

“I love you,” Alec whispers, though it comes out as a broken, breathy almost-wail, pressed into the side of Magnus’ head, the tickle of his hair one of so many things he’s missed about Magnus in all of their fighting. Who knows; maybe tonight will be the first time in days he manages to sleep more than a few minutes at a time, that when he wakes in a panic remembering he’s lost Magnus, he'll find Magnus right there, clinging just as tight, seeking the same reassurance Alec knows he’s got to be needing himself.

“I don’t know how to not love you,” Magnus confesses, and the tone of it makes Alec smile, gives him enough strength to pull back just a touch to throw his arm around Magnus’ shoulders, the apartment building finally looming close.

“Did you try?” Alec asks as they walk, because he’s cruel to himself like that, finding reasons to relive the hurt he’s brought upon himself, desperate for Magnus’ forgiveness even though he knows he’s not earned it yet. He won’t forgive himself, not for a long while, but when Magnus smiles at him like he’s doing right then it’s a little easier to push the thought to one side.

“Not too hard,” Magnus smiles, shrugging from Alec’s arm so he can lace their fingers together, raising their joined hands enough so he can kiss the back of Alec’s hand. And the look he gives him then puts strength in Alec’s legs, determination in his spine; he has to get away from these empty streets that feel too crowded, it’s too hard to be so far away from Magnus like he is out here. Alec bends to kiss him, and Magnus seems to know that it’s an encouragement, because a second later he’s tugging on his fingers, and pulling him towards the apartment building door.

If they took the elevator, climbed the stairs, or Magnus found a little residual magic to portal them into the loft, Alec doesn’t know; all he does know is that he’s grounded, solid, whole again like he hasn’t been feeling since Magnus walked away from him outside that room when he’d feared he’d lose Max. He’s relived it a thousand times since, chased after him, called him back, held on to his hand instead of letting him go. But now they’re here, _they’re here_ ; and though they really do have a world of things to talk about, this isn’t the time, this isn’t that moment. In this moment, all they have to think about is each other and themselves.

“I love you,” Alec repeats, because it’s important that Magnus hears it, important that he knows it, and that he means it more than Alec’s probably meant anything else.

“I love you too,” Magnus beams back at him, his eyes sparkling with triumph, love, and of all things awe, like Magnus still struggles with the idea that he deserves it. Like Magnus still thinks he isn’t worthy of being loved.

Alec cups his face again as he backs them into the bedroom, kisses him sweet, and slow, and it’s not so much as relearning the taste and shape of him, but of letting himself be where he belongs. With Magnus, here in this loft, where he is truly home.

 


End file.
